Lesson in Faith & Trust

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."
1 Peter 5:7 (NIV)

Over the past several months I have learned to keep my faith in God because He has a greater plan for me and He will always provide what we need. While I do have faith and trust in Him, it's still hard for me not to worry some when I see a very small amount in our savings account and our checking has no wiggle room after paying bills knowing that some major payments are due soon. The property taxes on my car are due the end of December and it's rather high since my car is fairly new and I started to worry how that was going to be paid. We didn't have enough in our savings to cover it and I knew there's no extra money after paying bills to transfer any money from our checking. Plus, with a baby on the way, I've been trying to get good deals on baby items that I know we'll need and stock up now so it's not overwhelming later when I realize the baby is almost here and nothing's ready. lol. I was very blessed the other week when a Facebook friend offered to sell me her crib & matching dresser. It was the exact color I was wanting, in perfect condition, and it was a 3-in-1 which I definitely wanted. I wasn't sure how long she'd hold onto these items before wanting to sell them to someone else so I was hoping to buy them soon, but once again I worried how we were going to pay for it. We don't have the money to even pay my car taxes, how on Earth were we going to be able to buy the baby furniture? Not to mention we're traveling to Indiana for the holidays and that 11 hour trip (one-way) isn't cheap! I had faith that things would work out, but struggled with trusting God that the finances would be there.

In the past week God has proven, once again, that I need to stop worrying and fully trust Him. Four times actually He showed me, two were big, overwhelming examples. He first showed me when we received our bi-annual safe driver check from Allstate. We get these twice a year and they're around $35. It's not much but it definitely helps. I immediately put it in our savings. The next day or so I get a check from Scott's old apartment complex with our deposit amount of $65. I knew this was coming but didn't know when and it was definite perfect timing! This went straight into savings. I was starting to have some relief since I knew we could now pay my taxes. The first big example was while I was paying bills. My car payment is due the 22nd of every month. My original 3-year financed agreement ended 10/22/13 so the remaining balance was being refinanced. And for those that don't know, when you refinance anything you generally get to skip a payment month. I wasn't sure if that was the case this time. I received my new finance agreement via mail to sign and it said my next payment date was 12/22/13 but I wanted to double check with their website when it came time to make the payment for 11/22/13. I checked the site, and no payment! That's $300 right there that we could save that month, so of course I put it in savings. That was my first big "ah ha" moment. The second time was today. Every year my company gives us a Christmas bonus if they've had a great year. Last year I was fairly new so I didn't get the full amount and when I received the envelope with my bonus today, I wasn't sure how much a bonus would be. I opened it to see $200! Thank you Lord!

I really don't understand why I worry when He proves to me time and time again that He'll take care of me. Our finances have always been the hardest thing for me to let go of. My husband and I struggled financially the first year or 2 of marriage, which is probably why it's so hard for me. We battled lots of identity theft, speeding tickets that were never sent to us, my husband got out of the army and struggled to keep a job in the civilian world and I was a college student so we had to live off of his army pay and our savings once he got out. I am so thankful for how God grew and strengthened us as a couple and so thankful that we have been financially stable (for the most part) ever since. I guess this is a continual lesson I'll have to learn, but I hope one day I can truly put all of my worries, doubts, & cares on His shoulders so I can live stress-free and worry-free. None of these are purely coincidence. This is all God's doing and He always has perfect timing. :) I am feeling very thankful and blessed.

Test of Faith

I don't know nor can I easily explain the way God has opened up my eyes and my heart the past few weeks. The sense of peace & understanding that He has placed on my heart the past few months is just amazing. I have no words to describe it other than amazing. :) Life has thrown a few curveballs recently and usually I would immediately get heated and upset and I would stay that way for the rest of the day, sometimes a few days depending on what happened. I have always wanted to be able to just let things go but knew I couldn't do it myself. I don't know what God has done, but I have been able to remain calm and understanding and trust that He has a plan. It is such an amazing feeling! What a weight off my shoulders!

This past Sunday Pastor Perry preached about money, explaining the difference between tithing and offering and why it's so important to God and for our walk with Christ. He explained it with a different perspective than I'm used to and it was like a light bulb going off. He then did a live sermon that night called Unleashing Your Finances where he went over 5 steps to free yourself from your finances and debt. Scott and I are having to face major financial issues in the next few months so getting our finances in order is going to play a major part in helping us get through it. Scott & I agreed that, since his paycheck is about to be changed, we'd start in November so it was less complicating. Pastor Perry even mentioned that if we follow these steps for 90 days, something major is going to happen that will cost a lot of money. Something will break, need to be replaced/fixed, etc. Something will happen to test our faith.

Earlier this month we were faced with having to pay late charges on his government travel card, which is a whole other story. Basically, his unit paid his card on time, but somehow the money was put in the wrong account and 4 months later, the bank refuses to waive the fee and the unit refuses to pay the fee and we have to pay it otherwise Scott will be demoted & possibly lose his AGR slot. Anyway, it worked out that I had an extra paycheck last month (thank you 3 Fridays!) and we were able to cover it. That is one of those situations that I usually would stay heated about for days, but thanks to God keeping me calm & my eyes & mind open, He explained things will be ok and helped me notice the extra paycheck. He will provide!

Back on point, another bigger financial situation has hit: a speeding ticket while in a school zone. The lights weren't flashing but the traffic cam caught Scott "speeding". (He was going 33mph in a 25mph school zone even though he was actually going under the 35mph limit.) The price: over $400. Yikes! My immediate reaction was to be upset and say to myself "not again" because we have gone through this multiple times and then some in the past 4+ years of marriage. I told him to fight it because this seemed unfair. I complained about it to some friends asking "WHY does everything dealing with money happen at once?! :(" After reading a few of their replies, God answered me. He's testing my faith. He's seeing if I will trust that He has a plan and things will be ok. Just like Pastor Perry said. I couldn't help but smile when I realized this. I immediately had a sense of peace. I DO trust Him and have faith that He will provide. I have grown up in church but this is the first time in my 25 years that I can recall feeling like this in my relationship with Christ. It's indescribable! I've always heard that if you ask God for patience, He's not going to give you patience. He's going to bring about situations to TEST & GROW your patience. Another light bulb went off. It makes complete sense to me now. We have a lot going on in our life between now and mid-October but I have faith that God has a plan and He will make a way where there seems to be no way. ♥ :)